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John Austin · (07-24-2013)

>> Crimson Dong A' Mania

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So here we go, a open invitational tournament on Madness for a shot against 3x's better, XWF's resident Loose Cannon, Sid Feder. Seems no-one will know who their opponent is until Madness but does that bother John Austin? nah. What bothers John Austin is those horrible infomercials on late night television. What bothers John Austin are the current outrageous gas prices in the East Coast but not who he will be facing at Madness.

We begin inside the truck of John Austin. Looks like he has a dashboard camera mounted in his car as we see him smoking a Marlboro red and wearing his feminine pink sun glasses. HEY! real men wear pink :P ...seems like Austin is focusing on the road, where he is going, no one knows. We can hear rock super God, "Dio" playing in the background from his radio

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Last week on Madness, I promised to all of you that the Incredible People was going to end and look what happened. We took out those dreadful Crimson Knights and that wannabe Connection, The Incredible People. No longer will they spend hours boring you to death worse than a Luca Arzegotti promo.

Now some wonder why The Connection cost Mr. Desmond his match but for those who clearly didn't see what happened, Desmond had already beaten Shawn Steele. We took it upon ourselves to then just inflict as much punishment as we could on that roided up jock. I keep telling you, when we set out to do something, unlike those groups before in XWF, WE actually get the job done.

John takes a drag of the cigarette and blows the disgusting smoke into the air of his car. Seems like we are at a stop light sense the motion of moving has stopped.

Now this week a tournament is in play to be the number one contender to Sid Feder's title. Also we will not know who we are facing until we are in that ring. I was able to catch some of the promos already from the boys and it gives me a chance to size up the competition. I seen that both Aldway and Morrison has entered themselves into the picture. More members of The Connection in the tournament means more domination here in XWF.

I also seen the looks of a guy named Jonny Rebel making his presence known and Jonny, giving us props is something that does not need to be done. Everyone already knows how great our group is and we don't need some green-horn trying to jump on the band-wagon. For you to think for once second you are going to become number one contender is a complete joke. ....Moving on.

John lays down on the horn real fast.

OUT OF THA WAY! ....f*cking asshole

John can be seen turning the steering wheel and looks to be parking the car. He turns off the engine and takes off his glasses. He rubs his eyes a couple times and places the glasses back on his face. He takes a look at the dashboard cam.

Now I was also to catch one of the god-AWFUL ramblings of one Luca Arzegotti. A man who seems to have Connection envy as one would say. You know for week after week, I have seen your ramblings and you always bring up The Connection. You must have a real hard on for us. Does the power of Nightmare turn you on or is it my gorgeous looks *laughs cocky like* ...either way, Luca you may call me boring, you may call me autistic and you know what that may be true in some form but at least I don't ramble in-coherently like the drunks in Richmond, Virginia. When you cut a promo that actually makes sense, give me a call.

Finally we have the ever popular ...The Crimson Dong. *Laughs among himself*...You know I could sit here and talk so much shit about you Dong but let's face it, you are a trip brotha. You are on a whole nother world out there in the cosmos and no-one has the balls to enter into that world. Hell, I know I don't. All I will say to you my man is good-luck.

John takes a short pause.

Whoever I face on Madness, be ready to enter into the ring with the best wrestler in the world. Look back and see what happened to The Crimson Knights, Scott Charlotte or hell, even recently with Shawn Steele. I make my presence known in more ways than one. I am looking to earn what is rightfully mine and show Sid Feder that I should have been the one to become European Champion at Leap of Faith.

I am the hottest thing going here in XWF. My list of achievements reads a mile long. It will be a long ride to the top of the mountain but when I get there I will be YOUR NEW European champion and there is nothing anyone can do about it

John turns off the dashboard camera as our scene ends

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